Friday, December 11, 2009

Wildwood Daze!!!!

WILDWOOD NJ!! - MY JERSEY SHORE!


A'ight. I am officially a Liberty Bell again. I love. Love. LOVE! IT!!! I moved away in Sept. of '99. I was craving culture, adventure, maturity and introspection. I wanted to do things my own way. Wanted to pave my own path and cheer to my own crowd. Metaphorically, and with a touch of realism. Been there, cheered that. I moved away in Sept. of '09. In my time away, I learned A LOT! Some I will tell you now, some I will remember next month, some.... in another 2+ years. =) Stick around. I can promise even more fun.



I have lived in PA, NJ, AZ, TX, & TN. Even MOST of my well traveled friends can't say they have been able to stay in a place long enough to really understand the culture. My Philly friends who visit the "Jersey Shore", where I live now, year after year, or who own real-estate here, don't get the full understanding of W.W. They know the summer version, but the other 3 seasons are just as cool. It's during those moments, that W.W. shines.




To understand the island, to get an true idea of how incredible this place is, you have to live here off season. Honestly. You might think there is nothing to do. You might think noone really lives here. You would be mistaken. You might just find you love the seasonal rush. The relaxtion of the off-season might rest and refresh your soul. It's even more refreshing during the off season.



The summer stereotype is a dark contrast against the stark beliefs of many W.W. vacationers. The year round inhabitants here are amazing! Everyone has a story. Northern people might appear rude to southerners, or midwestern folk. Curt is how I would aptly describe them. But, man! Get to know a teacher, fireman, police-officer, nurse, or pizza maker here, and you can't help to feel that they are relatable. Likeable. Each person has a story. If you give them 10 minutes they will tell it to you during the 1st meeting. They will bear their souls without worry. This is the way people here connect. It's amazing. They will blossom and offer their story. No walls. If you like them, if you accept them, you are friends. If not, you move on. And honestly, everyone just wants to be friends. Honesty is not just a virtue here, it's a way of life. It's SO cool!



THEY might say things like, " No bars open, no restaurants.! Boardwalk, Rick's seafood and most other landmarks are closed! There is noone there in the winter and nothing to do!" They are SO wrong. The people who own those things DO live here - for the most part. They just close down during the off season and are able to concentrate on family. Us, "vacationers", enable them to do that. They, are the truly rich - even though they are blue-collar. They concentrate on families, kids, and community during the 3 off seasons. They come together to create an incredible and safe environment. It's a great place to raise kids! The whole community comes together for the kids each and every holiday. Wildwood is the City of Parades! Did you know that? There is 1 almost EVERY weekend. Even in Oct., Nov., Dec., Jan., etc....

Don't go getting offended Philly! Just take it like a guy in TX, TN or CA, would react if you said, "YOU can make a REAL cheesesteak? Good luck! Your water isn't dirty enough to make good bread." Open your eyes and realize what this place holds. It's a GOLDMINE!!!!



My grandparents met, and started our family tradition here. My grandmom was Miss North Wildwood. (My sister is the current firt runner up!) She was dating Dean Martin and had her modeling pictures displayed all over billboards in NJ, & PA during her early years. She dated men that would eventually become senators, movie stars, or politicians. My Pop-Pop was a lifeguard when they met, but eventually worked as an Asst. D.A. in Philly under Bobby Kennedy. He was 1 of the main players in the indictment of Jimmy Hoffa - jury tampering. (My uncle Mark holds the title of D.A. Superstar now. And HE is a Pitbull!!)



My pops was in charge of the public exchange between judicial representatives. Bobby Kennedy asked him to publicly take Jimmy, in cuffs, in front of the media and make the transfer. This was a moment where pops could have gained public popularity. But my pops was the one who refused to do it publicly. My pop argued against the Paparazzi effect. HE was the one who said, NO- I will not make him suffer public humiliation for no reason! "Now that I know it will hurt someone, I will not play by YOUR rules. Hate me if you want." It runs in the blood. My family doesn't drink poisonous Kool-Aid. We don't snitch. We stand for principles, and evacuate the situation, or take charge of the moment before the morals go down the tubes. My family rocks and I am proud of them!


We may not be perfect. In fact, we all take pride in the fact that we are NOT perfect. But we embrace our intuition towards justice. Our moral compasses point north. We defend the underdog. I am not saying none of us ever strayed south, I am just saying, there were morals, cultural influences, and reasons we strayed. But our moral compasses were always easily corrected. We strive for justice. We even tell on ourselves. Hello... I can't keep my own faults quiet.


So after living all over the world, why would I return to Wildwood after all these years? Tell me these smiles, which happen 100 times a day here, aren't worth it. They are to me. They will be, to them ,when they grow up and have families of their own. I am supplying a nucleus for them. I am showing them a place to heal when the world turns it's back on you. I am showing them how to live out loud! And I am showing them that there are places that you can live that make you feel safe. Most people don't even lock their doors here.




This is the only place I have ever known as a home. Wildwood is my nucleus. Always has been. It has been for my entire family. So, if you did not know me B.C. - Before Cheer - you may not understand the importance of my return. This place is more important than cheer. I LOVE cheer! LOVE the coaches! LOVE the athletes! I didn't LOVE my location in Memphis.
Yes, I could coach here. I could open a gym. But I choose to concentrate on my kids right now. I have incredible friends who coach and I can live vicariously through them.
Why did I dislike Memphis so much you may ask? It all started when I was held up at gunpoint, during the middle of a March afternoon, in front of Target while I was with my kids. 3 people in a rusty gold Honda held up a mailman at gunpoint and then tailed me to the Target a 1/2 mile from my house. I noticed the car while pulling out of a Bank of America. I also noticed a guy with a sweatshirt and a heavy jacket on, who seemed to be wherever I was in the store. As I walked out of the store, I noticed the gold car parked directly across from mine.
Then, out of the shadows stepped my stalker. He walked up behind me, grabbed me from behind and made every hair on the back of my neck stand up. I was about to have THAT moment. The one every mom and woman alone fears. Luckily, "Divine Intervention", occured. The cops stepped out from behind a wall, grabbed the guy and his 2 friends out of the car. While frisking the trio, they pulled guns, scissors, brass knuckles, and screwdrivers. Talk about timing.

During,(one of), the BEST career(s) of my life. I could not find a sense of security. Had my car broken into 3 times. (Starting on the 1st night I lived there.) When I told friends about the safety hazard, they all said, "Welcome to Memphis!" Robbery happened to almost everyone I knew there. Somehow, they got used to it. I never did. Nor did I want my kids to grow up thinking that was the norm, or that it was just a part of life. I wanted better for my kids. They deserved better. I knew a big city held big crime. This was a small city trying to pretend to be a big city, by increasing the crime rate. Maybe that is why Shelby County was the 4th hardest hit place in the country to lose real-estate value. Anybody want to buy a house?

I am not afraid to walk around the city streets of Philly, NYC, Madrid, London, Paris, Ontario, or Mexico at night. Go a 1/2 mile from my house in Memphis mid-afternoon, and I could be held at gun, screwdriver, scissor, or brass knuckle, point while my kids were in tow. Thank GOD for divine intervention. (I would rather change careers than feel unsafe. No perks are worth having to settle for semi-security.) I left some incredible friends behind. My heart still hurts and misses them. But I was tired of being scared. I wanted safety. It was time to go.



I visited Spain, on my own, with below conversational Spanish skills. I thrived. I traveled on a plane to Paris, France less than 5 days on the same American Airline flight that survived the "Shoe-bomber". I spent Y2K in London. Each time, I was told, "Don't Go!"- Your safety is at risk! I went anyway. I felt support walking the street of Chantilly, France during the New Years Day Parade when people were waving American flags out of their windows right after 9-11! I was at home across the pond. I knew I could face anything. Question was, did I have to?


Wildwood is a healing place. This is a place for people to be themselves. This is a place for people to relax. A place for love, introspection, discovery, and re-birth. So, if you wonder where is Jen? What is she doing? I am fine. I am finally home. Will I travel again? Hell, yeah! Am I chomping at the bit for it? Not anymore. Been there - survived that. I still love cheer. Still think the coaches are amazing in the time, effort, and love that they shovel out. But, I spend holidays at home with my family now. I choose Wildwood, NJ. And I am happy to the core.



This is the home of Do-Wap and the Jersey Boys. Here, I thrive in comfort food. Here, I understand honesty. Here, I don't hide behind the words, "Bless her heart!". Bless her heart is what southerners say before they insult somebody. It's like saying, "No offense but..." I can't do that. Those are ugly words meant to make the jerk who is about to insult somebody feel better about what is about to come out of their mouth. I would rather say to them, "Look sweetie others are talking about you. How can I help? And yes! I will be your friend no matter what.
I am not afraid of truth and I will not just appear during the good times." The NE crew has offered that to me and my family. I respect the honesty in that.
Look, Memphis is great! Beale street rocks! The culture there is phenominal! It's just not for me. Others seem to thrive there. I have nothing but respect for them. I admire that. However, I walk on the beach everyday. I know everyone who comes in contact with my kids. This is where I belong. I may pack up and move someday, until I need to heal again. Then, and every chance until then, I will come here to rest my soul. Here I find peace.

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